Social Networking Sites and Relationships

New media technologies have changed interpersonal relationships in many ways. Some of the ways may benefit relationships and some may harm them. Some people see the effects in their relationships and others don't recognize it or even think about it.

I think the social network sites that have become more popular lately have had the largest effects on relationships by either benefiting or hurting them.

The benefits of the sites is that it connects people all across the world. It gives people the chance to talk to people that they would not be able to see or speak on the phone with on a regular basis.

I found an article from the Vancouver Sun, July 15, 2007, by Linda Ngyen. The article is about a mom finding her son that she had been searching years for. The woman got pregnant at a young age and went through a closed adoption 20 years ago. The closed adoption meant that all the relevant documents were sealed and she spent a decade waiting to get her son’s name through an active registry, she finally received his name, but no other information, she began doing google searches to see if anything would come up. It was not til her friend suggested she search his name in facebook that she found. When she saw several pictures with his same name she picked his out and just knew it was her son. She wrote him and told him she was looking for someone and she verified his birth date and full name. He said that was him. Little did she know, Travis Sheppard was also in hopes of some day finding his birth family. Four months ago, Sheppard packed up his life in Winnipeg and came to Vancouver to track down the mother he knew only from adoption papers. Since meeting in person in a Commercial Drive restaurant on July 3, the two have grown close, visiting Vancouver landmarks together.

Without the technologies we have today this mother and son would have even more trouble finding each other. Now that they are together they can develop and strengthen their relationship.

Other benefits are that we can quickly have conversations with our friends instead of spending an hour on the phone with them. The sites allow us to multi-task. On campus I often see students that have their homework and their social cite pulled up on the screen and switch off between them both. It allows people with disabilities to write freely and utilize the site to help them become more confident in themselves. It also allows people who are shy to open themselves up to others. It is much easier to get online and have a conversation with someone than speaking back and forth. You can plan out every word you type and edit your words as many times as you want.

The sites are also harmful to relationships because they cut out the face-to-face conversations. Face-to-face conversations is better for relationships because they expose more about one another. On the internet you can hide who you really are. You can become anyone you would like to be.

As stated in the article "Do Artifacts Have Politics?" by Landon Winner, he explains that we can pick and choose our friends that we decide to socialize with therefore we are not exposing ourselves to a diversity of friends and beliefs. When someone requests to be your friend on facebook it is much easier to choose to deny them. If someone were trying to be your friend in person most people would be courteous or even be your friend because they may feel bad. It is much easier because you don't have to be face-to-face with someone. Also you can choose to have your personal page blocked and only give access to those you chose or allowed to be your friend. This makes it so you are only exposed to those you choose to be. If we are not exposed to all different kinds of people and beliefs than it is difficult to learn new things.

I was against the networking cites when they first began. I thought they were taking away the "normal" way to meet a friend or boyfriend/girlfriend. I thought that I could meet people just how I always have and either hang out with my friends or talk on the phone. But now that I have grown older and my friends have all gone their seperate ways in life and became very busy. I found it more and more difficult to call them or see them. I recently broke down and became a member of face book. I found it easier to contact most of my friends. I even have come in touch with friends I have not spoke with in years. I still don't know how I feel about the sites, but as the semester goes on I will think about the issue more.